Sitting here at Starbucks, it’s interesting the conversations you can eavesdrop on. There’s a young married couple two tables down. They have the cutest little girl. Blond wavy hair. Three or four years old.
The husband has been on his wife’s case from the moment they walked in. The only time he isn’t criticizing her is when he’s yelling at the girl. She’s full of energy. Can’t sit still. It annoys him.
The wife is unhappy. You can see it in the empty look in her eyes. Can’t blame her. I would be too, if this guy was in my grill all day.
Someday, she’ll have an affair. Someone will come along who treats her with kindness, tells her how nice she looks, makes her feel good about herself. Words of encouragement she longs to hear. And she’ll fall head over heels. You can bet the farm.
Her husband will be viewed as the victim. After all, she is the one who had the affair. She’s the one who was unfaithful, not him. And she will live with the shame.
I’d like to grab the guy by the throat and shake him. “Stick a sock in your mouth, Dude. Wake up! Look what you’re doing to your family.”
I am convinced, one of the biggest needs we have is the need for encouragement. Life has a way of beating up on you. Hitting you below the belt. And you’re left crying out, “Encourage me! Say something that will make me feel good about myself. Because right now, I’m feeling really cruddy.”
A couple years ago, I promised myself I would encourage my wife every day. I would encourage my children every opportunity I got. No more cutting remarks. No backhanded verbal jabs. And I won’t complain about other things. My job, my health, my finances. No one needs to hear how bad the president is doing. They don’t need me complaining about the price of gas. It just isn’t necessary.
Heed the words of Paul from 1 Thessalonians 5:11: Encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
I challenge you to make that commitment, as I did. Encourage your wife and children. Build them up every day. They are crying out for it.
September 30, 2006 at 7:53 pm
Best Blogs nominated your blog for this week’s pick! Congratulations, Del!
One of Christ’s admonitions to us is to encourage one another, for we daily fight a fierce battle and sometimes become quite weary. He also tell us to weep with one another, rejoice, laugh: in short, share in each other’s lives. There is so much we gain when we do as God would have us to do: the rewards are awesome, even in the here and now.
As a free Christian counselor and very visual, I tend to be a people watcher; much like you. It’s amazing what we pick up on, things that those people are usually so unaware. They would do well to pick up God’s mirror and see themselves as He sees them. The truth sets us free, truly free of all of Satan’s wiles and machinations and illusions. Praise the Lord!
Visit me sometime, dear brother, at http://bonnieq.wordpress.com
Love in Christ,
BonnieQ
Truth Seekers and Speakers, link on blog
Unicorn Haven, link on blog
September 30, 2006 at 10:23 pm
Wow, Bonnie! I just came back from your blog. Awesome stuff. Deep!!!
Me? I’m about a mile wide and an inch deep. I know a little about a lot and not much about anything. But I’m getting there.
Thanks for the encouragement.
Del
October 1, 2006 at 6:07 am
Quote from your post:
“A couple years ago, I promised myself I would encourage my wife every day. I would encourage my children every opportunity I got. No more cutting remarks. No backhanded verbal jabs. And I won’t complain about other things. My job, my health, my finances. No one needs to hear how bad the president is doing. They don’t need me complaining about the price of gas. It just isn’t necessary.
Heed the words of Paul from 1 Thessalonians 5:11: Encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”
That made my day for the second time today. God bless you Del!!!
Love,
Diana
October 1, 2006 at 8:03 am
Thanks Diana.
I’m reading between the lines – thinking maybe there have been times you could have used some encouragement from someone you loved. That’s my story in a nutshell.
Thanks for encouraging me today.
Del
October 1, 2006 at 11:16 am
Found you on best blogs. I’m looking for intelligent readers to come visit my blog, so drop on by.
I think the guy should read a book by Dr. Laura on 10 ways not to screw up your marriage. lol
October 1, 2006 at 6:55 pm
Cameron and I admire men that rise up to the challenge to be a leader in words & actions. It is like magnitism for us. We did make that vow to each other before getting married to give no visual or verbal or tone of disrespect to each other but honor, even down to sarcasim. It makes a difference and my heart truly goes out to those that really just aren’t aware of the amazing benifits of self control and honor and what life it brings to a relationship. I also think the second chapter of His Needs Her Needs was a paradigm shifter for me. I’ll be back again to read some of your earlier insights for I instinctively believe you have many. Blessings & God’s hand on your influence to men and all “dad.”
: )
October 6, 2006 at 7:17 am
found my way to your blog thru best blogs.. i agree that encouragement is one of our biggest needs… a little bit goes a long way
lost my dad ages ago. but i still got my mom.. still got family.
keep on writing!
October 12, 2006 at 6:59 am
(how do I make the font in this note just absolutely huge?! I want to!)
B R A V O D E L!
You expressed succinctly what it would take me three minutes and several paragraphs to express!
Wow I like the lenses you view life through! I made that committment to myself several years ago – it doesn’t deter the storms necessarily, but it certainly is a more bouyant outlook than most!
Keep on urging your readers to love and good deeds (Heb. 10.24). I’m a regular already. We NEED your digital voice in this world!
Much appreciation –
Phil —
October 13, 2006 at 8:35 am
I just showed this post to mum and she loved it
thanks Del
October 20, 2006 at 6:19 am
can u please help me find me dad his name i josph ernest lee i have tried 4 5 years
April 21, 2007 at 3:45 am
I pray that you all find wisdom to encourage and be encouraged. In Jesus name I pray for you.
Amen
December 15, 2007 at 11:43 am
very interesting, but I don’t agree with you
Idetrorce